As it turns out, there was to be no umbrella diagnosis that explained everything I was experiencing. And when multiple doctors concluded they didn’t know what more they could do, I had to face the fact that healing wasn’t in the cards.
I wasn’t going to recover; I wasn’t going to be the husband and father I once was; I wasn’t going to tackle another house or yard project; nor was I going to return to full-time work or resume the mentoring and counseling that I so longed to do. Whatever hope I had turned to hopelessness as reality set in.